Not letting a loved one’s anxiety disorder derail your relationship with them is not easy. Here’s … [+]
Many people come to therapy seeking advice on how to help a partner or close loved one manage their anxiety. They ask questions like:
- “What can I do to support my partner when they are feeling anxious?”
- “How can I understand what they going through and be there for them?”
- “How can I help them manage their anxiety without making them feel like I am controlling or micromanaging them?”
You are not alone if you find yourself in a similar circumstance. According to research, anxiety can negatively affect relationships, so it’s crucial that we work together to develop healthy coping mechanisms.
Here are two recommendations based on scientific evidence to help you help your loved one through their anxiety.
#1. Don’t let them feel misunderstood
Anxiety disorders come in all shapes and sizes, so it’s important that you understand exactly what this person is dealing with.
Whether it is Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Social Anxiety Disorder, Panic Disorder, or a Phobia, acknowledging that your loved one’s emotions are real to them is crucial. Although you may be tempted to counter their emotional reactions to situations with logic, this can be tricky to do without making them feel misunderstood.
Instead, try to help them regulate their emotions by asking them simple questions about their emotional state and allowing them to come to an organic conclusion that their fear or anxiety is unfounded. It is crucial that they come to this conclusion themselves.
A review paper published in the Journal of Psychopathology and Behavioral Assessment reaffirms that emotional regulation — or understanding, controlling, and responding to emotions — is a useful method to combat anxiety disorders. Emotion regulation techniques can alter emotional responses, and this can be seen at the cognitive, behavioral, and neural levels. These techniques can temper the behavioral, cognitive, and physiological signs of anxiety.
#2. Know when to seek professional help
Seeking help is an important step to take if you find that the relationship problems stemming from your loved one’s anxiety are getting worse in spite of both of you trying to address it.
In such cases, a mental health professional can guide you toward the best ways to address the lingering issues. Encouraging your loved one to attend therapy can provide practical tools and strategies for managing anxiety and improving your relationship with them. If you are in a romantic relationship with this person, couples counseling can help.
For instance, a study published in the Journal of Couple and Relationship Therapy found that emotionally focused therapy may be a promising way to treat couples when one partner has Generalized Anxiety Disorder.
Generalized Anxiety Disorder can bring with it a slew of relationship problems. If your loved one suffers from Generalized Anxiety Disorder, they may show you through their actions (or words) that they are insecure about the relationship. You may feel that they constantly search for safety in the relationship even when no apparent threat to the relationship exists. This can put a strain on your relationship, as your partner can come across as needy, demanding, or disrespectful of your personal space.
This is the sort of relationship distress emotionally focused therapy is designed to tackle. Since it is a short-term therapy, a few sessions with a therapist can help you understand your partner better, strengthen your bond with them, and process your emotions in a healthier way.
Conclusion
Dealing with a loved one’s anxiety can be challenging, but it is necessary to address it if you want to build a healthier relationship with them moving forward. By practicing emotional regulation, creating a safe space, and seeking professional help, you and your loved one can work together to manage anxiety and improve your relationship. Remember, it is important to prioritize self-care and seek support when needed, as taking care of your own well-being is key to supporting the people in your life that matter most to you.
